So, I'm no longer friends with Autumn. My best friend since 9th grade has now vanished from my life. I'mnot saying that her friendship wasn't already slowly dwindeling, but.. you get the point. Airing it out, just so I can feel better. Below is the ENTIRE conversation. I'm not even going to proof read it, and/or take anything out. This is what it is.

& don't act like you never read one of these. Bottom to top, you know the drill.

just remeber.
u didnt want to be my friend first.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: miss feedmekicks. [RIP: JMD & SAT] BDAY: 8 days.
Date: Dec 6, 2008 10:25 PM

with an attitude like that- fuck it.

smh. its cool tho.

no hard feelings, u did make your decision.

wrong again, miss autumn.

but ill do your fam a favor & stop tlaking to you since they hate me so much.



----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: [[autumn christine ♥]]
Date: Dec 6, 2008 10:20 PM

ur the one who didnt want to be my friend first
and u said i can do whatever i want so im making my decision.
and u helped me make it.
and u were an impotant part of my life u were my freedom when i had none but u initiated this fight into something bigger.
i might have started it, but it wasnt on purpose.
and ill never see u after high school anyways so why not just be friends now and avoid any pain in the futer.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: miss feedmekicks. [RIP: JMD & SAT] BDAY: 8 days.
Date: Dec 6, 2008 10:14 PM

no, i see your point.

but who was the one who stopped tlaking to me first?


honestly, you are missing out.
im one of the best people that will ever be in your life.

wait til you graduate. you will see what im talking about.

half the people you talk to now, wont b there for u.

when u dont got anybody to smoke a blunt with, drink with, or skip class with...somebody who aint got a ride or money...somebody who aint gonna tlak shit about u...

you will realize i was the one from the get-go.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: [[autumn christine ♥]]
Date: Dec 6, 2008 10:11 PM

just cuz i dont initiate the conversation first dosent mean u cant.
and thats my point flat out.
if we were besties how come it was always a one way street until i talked to u first then we held a conversation.
do u see where im coming from.
we both have the option to talk to each other and neither of us took it and thats why were in a fight.
and thats both of our faults not just one person.
now u see my point.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: miss feedmekicks. [RIP: JMD & SAT] BDAY: 8 days.
Date: Dec 6, 2008 9:48 PM

i didnt threaten you autumn. you get yourself into enough things, i dont even have to waste my time and throw threats.

& i do see your point. i just feel like theres no excuse for how you been acting.

i feel like theres no point in me trying to talk to u, if u aint doing the same.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: [[autumn christine ♥]]
Date: Dec 6, 2008 9:46 PM

i didnt and never did say i didnt do anything, i see ur point perfectly, but i could say the same thing for u.
but i dont want to make evrything an issue.
and u need to see where im coming from cuz i dont think u do.
and please dont threaten me its rude.
and u wudnt be feeling this way if u wud have come and talked to me when u started to feel like i was being a bitch. i cant read minds audrey. even if u were my best friend. and in my opinion im in my right mind. ive opened up my eyes. thats why ive decided we just need to be friends NOT besties cuz we have to many issues and we always fight and its just pointless. cuz im tired of the fights.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: miss feedmekicks. [RIP: JMD & SAT] BDAY: 8 days.
Date: Dec 6, 2008 9:35 PM

its funny how u just sit & think that you didnt do anything.

smh. if you talked & acted like a friend..i wouldnt be feelin this way.

but do u.

hopefully you get your mind right sooner than later.
id hate to see some fucked up things happen to someone ive cared about all this time.

when youre ready & willing to talk to me, trust me, and care about me the way i care about you- ill still be here to be your best friend.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: [[autumn christine ♥]]
Date: Dec 6, 2008 9:33 PM

i didnt cause shyt there u go blaming me again FRIENDSHIP IS A TWO WAYY STREET AUDGE. and thats my point. and we BOTH GREW UP AND GREW APART. i dont think we have anything in common anymore with each other. and thats why im choosing to just be friends now. im done with the bestie fights its irritating and it gets old just remeber i wont forget our memories no matter what happens and ill always remember u. not even if we never talk again.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: miss feedmekicks. [RIP: JMD & SAT] BDAY: 8 days.
Date: Dec 6, 2008 9:26 PM

do what you want.

but reality check for your damn self: you caused all this & YOU are the one that changed.

i havent changed, i just grew up.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: [[autumn christine ♥]]
Date: Dec 6, 2008 9:18 PM

u were th only person i knew at the time who had her number.
and i needed it excuse me if i got deperate. and put urself out there?? how do u think i feel u never tell me anything EVER u never do now and u never used to like i did u. and the whle chase thing is cuz chase hasnt changed and i know how hes gonna react to whatever i say and i dont ask u to stck up for me for whatever reason cuz reality check i dont care what a bitch says about me its prolly as fake as them.
so dont make that an issue. and also i try well tried to talk to u in class and u jsut come off to me as u dont care what i have to say so i tell skye cuz she listens and dosent ignore me. maybe we have grown apart and we dont need to be besties maybe we should just be friends cuz obviously being besties is causing more problems. and dont sit there and say skyes my best friend cuz after u im done with besties its juvenile and were growing up its pointless to have besties cuz after high school u dont see anyone anymore anyways.
cuz i dont want any bad blood between us so maybe we should just be friends. deal?

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: miss feedmekicks. [RIP: JMD & SAT] BDAY: 8 days.
Date: Dec 6, 2008 9:05 PM

we both have changed since freshman year. i dont know how u can be scared to tell me stuff if im your best friend. it doesnt really matter. ive never judged you & i stay stickin up for you every time ppl say shit about you & you arent around.

& you just made my point clear. you keep it real with chase no matter what? but cant with me? yeah...see. its pretty much time to just let shit go. idk.

i never tell you anything anymore because you dont tell me things. i already knew u didnt tell me shit, so hey why would i put my self out there if u dont? makes no sense. im not gonna beg or kiss your ass to be my friend. & if i see that you arent being my friend, than im not gonna try.

& youre right. we dont got classes, but that means you should atleast try and talk to me in the class we do have. dont u think? idk. do what uw ant autumn. it doesnt matter. at semester i wont see anybody so i dont care.

& i blew up because u dont even txt me to talk, but you can text me and ask for some bitches number? THAT MAKES ALOT OF SENSE.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: [[autumn christine ♥]]
Date: Dec 6, 2008 8:58 PM

well last time we talked lots u told me u only have 1 day off so sorry if thats what i thought u never tell me ur schedule so how am i suppose to know.
and u never tell me anything either or u hardly do just like me.
and i dont tell u all the details cuz u've changed lots scnce freshman year and idk how u will react to what i'd be telling u now and i really am kind of scared to find out and idk why?? [[and i know it dsent make sense but its hard to explain]]
so thats why i tell skye or chase cuz i keep it real with chase no matter what it is just cuz thats chase nd skye well she just listens and it just seems like she understands where im coming from. and i had no idea ppl were acting like that i mean it wasnt all just my fault like u make it seem like. i mean i dont see why i have to approach u first with sumthing i mean it goes both ways. and we have no classes so naturally we wont be around esch other lots.
i mean i have the opportunity just as much as u do to talk to each other. like i said i dont see why i have to start the convo first. u know. cuz u never come up to me and tell me anything like i used to with u. just out of the blue.
and i knew u were mad but i figured if u had an issue u would come to me and talk to me like we used too but u never did so i thought we were cool then u jsut belw up on me when i asked u for skyes number.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: miss feedmekicks. [RIP: JMD & SAT] BDAY: 8 days.
Date: Dec 6, 2008 8:43 PM

well for one, i have 2 days off of work. i do work alot, but i got things to do & i need to help my mom with bills. you dont even know my schedule to know when or when i dont work. the reason why i acted like i didnt care is because u would sit & tell me one story WITHOUT details autumn & then turn around and tell the same story to skye or chase or someone else with ALL details. that hurt ME because we are supposed to be "best friends". it hurts me to have ppl i barely know walk up to me & be like "why arent u & autumn friends? why dont u & autumn talk? why dont i ever see autumn around u?"

it took alot from me to finally say that i dont feel like u are my best friend. yeah, its possible that we can be friends by not talking alot, but why would we not talk alot when we have the opportunity to talk autumn? it just makes me think that you can and should have a better or different best friend.

i WANT you to have other friends, but i dont want to be neglected by you when you do. it seems like udont understand how i feel. after a while, i just didnt care anymore & i never said nanything to u about it.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: [[autumn christine ♥]]
Date: Dec 6, 2008 8:37 PM

ok well im sorry for not talking to u a much as we used to and when i try to talk to u u act like im not there or u dont care what i have to say.
and u might not realize it but i do. and that hurts and that makes me sad how u can sit there and say u dont want to be my friend just cuz i dont talk to u that much.
and i put skye up there like that cuz i did what u wanted me too. if u notice i still have u up there and ur still on my page..and ok maybe i was a little mad. and u make it seem like i cant have other friends even if its not what ur intentions are. that is just what it comes off as to me.
and i hung out with her once and that was homecoming and thats cuz she had noone else to go with, and i had never hung out with her b4, ur always busy u say so urself its kind of hard to spend time with u in and out of school when u work alot and thats not ur fault, but u get what one day off, audge we dont live close anymore, so its gonna be harder to hang out. but u were real quick to just gve up on our friendship and thats why im mad cuz i love u audge and i never ment for it to seem like i hated u. but in my opinion we can be besties and not talk a lot cuz that just proves how strong our friendship is, but obviously it wasnt as strong as i thought.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: miss feedmekicks. [RIP: JMD & SAT] BDAY: 8 days.
Date: Dec 6, 2008 8:26 PM

no rachel isnt gonna be my new best friend. i really dont care whos best friend he is to be honest. but for someone who is still gonna keep me as thier best friend, you sure were quick to put skye up there. its not about who you talk to hun, its about you NOT talking to me. i never said uu couldnt have firends. and thats now what this is about autumn. dont turn it into something its not. i dont care if you talk to skye, thats cool that you do because shes my friend too. the problem i have is of you not talking to me. thats all.

and im not saying you are a bad friend. i never said that at all. hun, please dont put words in my mouth. but for some reason u can call, hang out, and everyhting else with her- but not me. seems silly. dont u think?

and thats good that you wanna keep whatedever you want on your page. im not saying you arent my best friend. you made it seem that way..

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: [[autumn christine ♥]]
Date: Dec 6, 2008 8:18 PM

see now thats childish because im not blowing out of proportion like u audge.
first off if u werent so worried about me u wudnt be lookin at my page so hard.
and secondly a thought just occured to me...what about racheal is she gonna be ur new bestie?? cuz oh yea u talk to her just as much as i talk to skye maybe even more.
and also i dont know why u seem to think i talk to skye so much i actually dont talk to her outside of school, unlike u probly do with racheal. so i dont see how once agan its all my fault why were not besties when u made the same decisions i did.
u said urself u see her more than me so stop tripping and have her be ur best friend.
but that might be a problem cuz shees bekkas bestie too. so aww thats too bad.
and also after this semester i wont see skye or prolly talk to her cuz we have differnt classes.
and what about that one talk we had that no matter how much we talk to pther people well still be besties and not trip over it...huh??
oh maybe u forgot, so that just shows how good of a friend u are if u can forget something we talked about.
but oh no im the bad friend here.
so i just dont see how its all my fault and just wanted to clear that up and also ill keep whatever i want on my page cuz even if im not ur bestie ur still mine cuz im not about to forget and let go of all our memories idc how far we grow apart because that would be below me.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: miss feedmekicks. [RIP: JMD & SAT] BDAY: 8 days.
Date: Dec 6, 2008 7:41 PM

too bad you forgot to change your page.
make sure it says "my best friend is: skye mapes"

wouldnt wanna take too much credit from your friend =|


Chicky Love! said...

damn hun that is crazy, i'm sorry you lost your best friend hunnie, ya'll both are going through a lot maybe something will work out. <3