4.19.2009

HOW DOES IT FEEL?

Have you ever done something you feel really bad about? Something that was pointless and lame and there was no reason you should have done it? You did it because it was going to make you feel better, but it wasn't right. I done something like that and I wish I could take it back. What's worse is that, I still kept feeling bad about it, even after the person who was the "victim" forgave me.

It sucks because that person was supposed to have forgave me and it was all behind us, then I'm not sure what happened. Next thing I know everything isn't okay. What went on? I really don't know. I won't sit and try to make things better, because obviously that's not going to work. I believe it's also a lost cause, because my impression is already tarnished. I tried to feel better about it all, but I can't. It was a mistake that I made, and I have stopped making that same mistake for some months now.

I just want to low-key tell her that what she must think, isn't the least bit right. I left all that stuff in the past, and am no longer making mistakes like that. She's a really good person, though. I don't want to say anything more, because I don't want her to think I'm trying to be her friend again.

-sighs.


On a side note, I realize that I have changed a lot of these past few years, but who doesn't right? People keep telling me that I've changed, but honestly i think I just found out who i really am. I am finally comfortable with myself. sure I have flaws and want to change things about myself, but it's not a problem being in my own skin anymore. It's almost insane how it happened though. It came from nowhere. this confidence, I mean.

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