It's goodbye for 2008. Everyone is making it seem like they are going to transform into a whole new person, within only a few hours. That's all good and dandy that you want to make resolutions and shit, but half of you won't even follow through. Everyone does it, so why continue to act like all of a sudden you will change into this OH SO MUCH GREATER THAN IN 08 type of person. Not likely to happen.

Anyway, the point of this blog being is just to post. I guess since everyone else is all excited to "change" and shit, I might as well just jump on the last post band wagon.

2008 was pretty traumatic for me.

I won't talk about it because 2009 will be here soon.
There's no need for a pity party.


See you in 2009.
Good luck to all you guys with your resolutions.



I got Photoshop on my laptop & shit. Now, I kind of cannot stop photoshopping. I made this:

I'm not like...super good or anything, but ya know! I'm working on it.


Here's the deal guys... I have a lot of time on my hands, so I wanted to start a new blog.

Not in place of this one, but as ANOTHER addition.

I want a blog to post pictures up of the shoes I buy or get. I mean, sure my internet alias is, miss feedmekicks, but I want to kind of set that a part from my actual blogging. I know on Myspace I constantly get this "let's talk about shoes" type of conversation, and it's not that I have an issue with that- I just really want people to know that there is more to me than just shoes.

So, with this new blog i want it to just be about my shoes. That's it. I don't want to mix this blog with that one, and ect ect. I want them to be seperate. I dunno. I was going to start making a layout for it tonight, but I decided against it ebcause I don't have a name for my blog. I want something short and sweet. I was brainstorming, but if you have any ideas that correlate to the whole feedmekicks concept, then just leave your idea in a comment PLEASEEEE.

I was thinking along the lines of...




I really don't know. I want somethin unique. Please help meeeeee



So, I was really going to blog about how crative and fucking smart Asian people are, but I really don't want to say any certain shit that will offend the Asian people. Um....So, I guess I won't.

Well, lemme just point out that Asians are like the smartest people EVER. Like if it wasn't for Chine, the fucking US would have like ZERO goods. Seriously. And like, every smart, funny, or fucking talented person on YouTube, is a FUCKING ASIAN! Like....FORREAL! I guess it kind of caught my attention with first Shantae's (theclicheblogger.blogspot.com) post about her Asian Christmas, then it was this YouTuber's video about Asian Christmas gifts or whatever (youtube.com/communitychannel), and then was lurking around and found like 20348920 make-up guru type people who were all Asian. Not to mention that Lizzy (slowjamtherapy.blogspot.com) and Shantae (theclicheblogger.blogspot.com) are both super creative and smart. Like..power to the Asian's. Fareal.

But like, no hatred towards the Asian people. I guess I'm a little envious because like....what are white people good at?

=| Yeah, I couldn't think of anything either....



Lately, I've been on my Tynisha Keli groupie status more than ever.

It's amazing how there's people who come from nothing to something. Tynisha has been struggling in the music game for about 10 years, been in foster care, lost her father at a young age, recently lost her younger brother, and has been in the hoods of MA all her life. I always get a kick out of seeing someone who is coming up in life, when it's tough as hell! Anyways, her voice is nice, she's a beautiful girl, and she's humble. Her story is quite the tale. I cannot wait to hear how her album actually turns out. It should be dropping in January. Keep a look-out for that.

So, in all good fun, I was bored and decided to make this....

I love it, even tho it is simple.
You CAN click it to see it better. the chronicles of tynisha keli is the title of her album, BTW.


It's almost a little funny, but not so much. It's basically pretty much a waste of time. For those of you who actually have a youtube channel that you post videos on, do you have the same "random users with no pic/video leaving hateration comments" problem as me? What makes it even worse is that, if you comment my videos telling me how ugly, fat, stupid i am- then please tell me WHY THE HELL YOU COMMENT ON MORE OF MY VIDEOS?! I absolutely don't understand. The comments really don't phase me at all, but it's just annoying. Like, how do you really have the audacity to type some shit about someone who isn't even interested in what your no video having ass has to say, and then do it to all the vids? You're a creeper. Plain & simple.



I hope everyone has/had a wonderful holiday.
I hope everyone got what they wanted and GAVE to some people as well.
and I hope that nobody's family got into fights, arguments, ect.

Mine didn't.
And I most definately will have to mark that on the calendar.

Anyways, have a good one.



Now, don't get it twisted- I dig Beyonce to the fullest. I adore her new cd set, but are all single ladies divas?

Diva - Beyonce

Above is the new Beyonce, Diva video. Now, if I'm not mistaken, are those the same two hoodrats from the Single Ladies vid? The whole mannequin & nice shades was a flick of the creative wand, but BITCH YOU CANNOT USE THE SAME STICK FOR EVERY VIDFEO!

=| Seriously. This chick has so much more creativity in her, which is why it's hard for me to understand why her videos are starting to drag. OH & BTW, isn't the whole fire blowing up scene the same shit that was in the Crazy In Love video?

I'm just saying....

I guess a diva is another word for uncreative.



To see things that choke you up, and almost bring tears to your eyes absolutely sucks. I ran across a certain Myspace page, a page of a young dude who passed away. Ironically, I cannot figure out HOW he passed, nor do I want to make any misleading judgements, but I do believe it was gang related issues. That is NOT the reason for me writing this post.

If you read the clipping, you will notice that this Taz dude had a few siblings, Tynisha being one of them. Tynisha Keli, a R&B singer, if you didn't already know.

It almost hurts ME to see what people like her go through. It's like, you never think it could get worse. I lost one of my friends, but she lost her brother! Someone that she grew up with, someone who she could always talk to, and someone that came to the same household every night and had that certain bond. If I lost my brother, I don't think I could live. I don't think that I would be able to handle that. It hurt me to read some of the comments left on this dudes page. It's miraculous how loyal people are. I'm going to drop you guys the link to his page.


You guys don't take life for granted. Don't take the people in your life for granted. Don't live your life not telling the people you care for that you love them. You might just loose someone that means the world to you. The experience is rough and it hurts.



Tonight, I went into my photobucket albums, and realized that there's too many old memories in there. I deaded Autmn from my life, so there's no need to have her on my friends list, pictures, or number in my phone. I deleted it all. I deleted her from my Myspace, all the pictures of us, and even her numbers. I kind of felt weary about deleting the pictures, because those hold memories or my teenage life. I did what I had to do. I;m not here to dwell on what never was, and what couldn't have been. There's no use in me trying to play the role and make excuses for her, saying she was a good friend and whatnot. Because she wasn't. Which was exactly the problem. If she was a good friend, she'd still be around. But enough of that...

I also cleaned out osme older pictures of me, my other friends, and even pets that I used to have. It's crazy how different I looked. I've changed a lot, just over the past year. Imagine me last November, which was exactly a year and a month ago, I had no piercings with long hair. And now... shits crazy.

Here's a prime example of how often I changed.

Here's sophmore year with jessica.

Then here's begining of junior year with jessica.

Now here's senior year with jessica, on my 18th birthday.

All in all, Jessica has been around for my whole high school experience. I wonder if she thinks I've changed?



Have you ever had someone around you that couldn't appreciate what they have for the life of them? They have so much, but still keep asking and asking. Sadly, they still keep receiving! Like...God! Can you fucking give me some shit to! Seriously.

It doesn't erk me because the people are like...fortunate, or whatever choice word you want to use. It pisses me off because they are so fortunate, yet still keep asking for more. They get what they want, are satisfied for a short while, and then they need something else.

I can't stand shit like that. I'm sorry, but life is about way more than always getting what you want.




I mean, that's IF you can find it.


tonight, Alex and I tried to go ice skating. Now, don't get me wrong, it was like cold as shit and shit but I was still trying to go! I've only been ice skating ONCE. Plus, I haven't chilled with her in a WHILLEEEEE.

Anyways, we couldn't find it. It sucksed.
But I am wearing my new Senior Gear.



I still get a kick out of this.
Like....Why? It's uber cute, yo!



All I have to say is...WOW.


Most of the people who I know that blog, are also tied into YouTube. YouTube is always fun and entertaining, but there's always a catch to something that seems so great. How many times have you jumped on YouTube and AUTOMATICALLY found an amazingly funny video? A video that tickles your fancy so much that you watch it 2 and 3 times? It's hard to do that shit! I recently ran across an actual blog that can help you, if you have this problem.

The Vlog Blog.

The above link, is a link to a blog. The whole point to this blog is to actually GIVE you videos that are worth watching. The two ladies that run the blog are really funny, and go through a lot, because we all know how hard it is to sift through the wack videos and find great ones. That's exactly what they do. They always have great videos to show you, with the Youtubers link and a short review about the channel. Check out this blog!

ANNNNDDD for the first time EVER, I actually tried singing on YouTube. I know I messed up and stuff, but hopefully it's okay.

You can visit my YouTube for more videos of myself.



Have you ever been at a point in your life where people just keep telling you things that you don't want to hear?
Have you ever had people tell you things, yet you felt they were completely wrong?

Two of my aunts are mad at my mom now. They are mad because I GUESS I'm "out of control". YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!
I am the farthest away from out of control that anybody could get.

I'm sick of people trying to tell me how the fuck I should live my life.
STFU & take care of yourself or your kids for that matter. Stop trying to tell me who I should be, what I should do, and how I should fucking act. If you don't like it, that's an issue that you've got to deal with PERSONALLY.



I'm so excited for Friday to come.
I CANNOT wait. You guys DO NOT understand how ready I am to be done with school.
I don't want to leave my friends though. And I know that once I leave, a lot of people will forget about me.

It's gonna be tough, but I'll manage. I can't be close with everybody.
Ahhh, well.

PS: I need to change my fishes water.
It looks like they are swimming in apple juice.
I know that sounds bad, but the only reason I haven't changed it os because it's for thier own good.

It's been so cold outside, I didn't want to switch thier water and then have the water not heat up to the right temperature.
Another thing, I am really proud of myself. i have been trying to keep my room clean, which is beyond the norm for me.



So, yesterday was my freakin birthday!
I turned 18.

I pretty much spent my day with Rachel & Jessica.
I feel kind of bad for how I treated both of them at the end, but I think they understand how I felt.
I love these girls.

I'll post pictures up later, I guess.
Here's a video of me getting my 12th piercing.
You can do stuff like this when you turn 18.

Anyways, you can also visit my YouTube channel.

Here's a few posts that were dedicated to me.

Rachel's Post.

Kidd Brother's Post.

Anyways, here's what my piercing looks like today.



I'll blog about it tomorrow, I think.

Until then, enjoy this picture of me.

Yeah, I got my lip done.


PS: I already had my monroe, if you DIDN't already know.



This shit is like....OD funny. Like, when I first seen it- I almost PISSED my pants. Seriously.
Watch it TEN times. NOW



SO, I know that I'm nowhere near innocent when it comes to being totally original. What I can say is that, I've also came up with things on my own & have had people take it upon themselves to use my shit. I know I can sit here and rant all day about Myspace and the people on there. Like I said- I AM NOT INNOCENT.

I've had my music player hidden on my page for...a while now. The other day, I took my DIV layout off and let everything be visible. I thought that stealing pictures, text, and songs was overrated already. I guess not.

I've had my profile music player visible for about 3 days, and I go to somebodys page. Somebody that I know in person, along with my little brother. She added a song from my music player. I wasn't mad at first. Then I seen that she had added another one of my songs. A song that I haven't seen on anyone elses page. WHY? I really don't understand. If you don't even know that song, why would you feel the need to steal it? I know I've dealt with a silly person stealing my pictures and other silly people stealing my about me sections and shit, but it's kind of old. and annoying not to mention.

So, I had to hide my shit.


SO, someone tell me why Usher just welcomed his second child on wednesday. I think there's something really wrong with this dude. Seriously. Tameka Foster isn't even cute! Like...WTFFF.

Anyways. My birthdya is in 3 days. Everyday I just keep getting more and more excited. Maybe it's just because I will finally be legal and stuff. Really, that doesn't matter because I don't do anything that I couldn't do if I wasn't legal. If that makes sense...

I cannot wait until December 19th. That will be my official last day of actual school. I'm going to be dong independant studies so I can just be at home all the freakin' time instead of getting up early and stuff.

Awesome right?

Yeah.....I know.



So, I got my new laptop. It's pretty spiffy. I just cannot get the webcam to work. It keeps telling me to plug in a video device. I don't understand because the webcam is built in. AHHHH! =[

What I'm really worried about is photoshop. I need it to live! :)

If anyone can help me out by giving me a serial code or anything to help me get it, I'd appreciate it.



You ever done something so unconsciously that you didn't even realize how harsh it would turn out? I did. I hurt my cousin. It sucks that I've got these "monster" tendencies that come from within me. I'm sorry. She knows who she is.

Below is a post from her:

i am having a hard time trying to figure out why there are so many people
around me changing. i know that change is good. also that it happens no matter if we want it to or not. the thing is that the people that are changing are people that i care about and i am related to. seems like the person that i once knew yesterday is not the same person that i am starting to notice. very recently i have been having a few issues with a cousin of mine. i do not know if it is just me being hard headed or infact if shes changing. this bothers me alot!!! first when i think about it i get sad. cuz we fight and argue through texts. then i get angry cuz i can not relate to her. i remember all to well what it was like to be 18. to have to live at home, work, go to school,the pressure of graduation. i hated my high school years. i knew alot of people-but didnt make alot of lasting freinds. sadley enough the people that i thought i could trust just fucked me over and washed thier hands of me in my 20's. i wish that i knew just what to say to make all her problems go away. i hope that in the near furture all of the stresses in her life vanish. and our relationship goes back to how it was. i miss it!!! i miss her.....

I hope she knows that I don't mean to hurt her. She means a lot to me and I look up to her. I don't look up to her just because she's my lovely cousin, but because she means a lot to me. She's a wonderful person inside and out & she's also tough. Stronger than I think I could ever be.



So, I'm no longer friends with Autumn. My best friend since 9th grade has now vanished from my life. I'mnot saying that her friendship wasn't already slowly dwindeling, but.. you get the point. Airing it out, just so I can feel better. Below is the ENTIRE conversation. I'm not even going to proof read it, and/or take anything out. This is what it is.

& don't act like you never read one of these. Bottom to top, you know the drill.

just remeber.
u didnt want to be my friend first.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: miss feedmekicks. [RIP: JMD & SAT] BDAY: 8 days.
Date: Dec 6, 2008 10:25 PM

with an attitude like that- fuck it.

smh. its cool tho.

no hard feelings, u did make your decision.

wrong again, miss autumn.

but ill do your fam a favor & stop tlaking to you since they hate me so much.



----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: [[autumn christine ♥]]
Date: Dec 6, 2008 10:20 PM

ur the one who didnt want to be my friend first
and u said i can do whatever i want so im making my decision.
and u helped me make it.
and u were an impotant part of my life u were my freedom when i had none but u initiated this fight into something bigger.
i might have started it, but it wasnt on purpose.
and ill never see u after high school anyways so why not just be friends now and avoid any pain in the futer.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: miss feedmekicks. [RIP: JMD & SAT] BDAY: 8 days.
Date: Dec 6, 2008 10:14 PM

no, i see your point.

but who was the one who stopped tlaking to me first?


honestly, you are missing out.
im one of the best people that will ever be in your life.

wait til you graduate. you will see what im talking about.

half the people you talk to now, wont b there for u.

when u dont got anybody to smoke a blunt with, drink with, or skip class with...somebody who aint got a ride or money...somebody who aint gonna tlak shit about u...

you will realize i was the one from the get-go.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: [[autumn christine ♥]]
Date: Dec 6, 2008 10:11 PM

just cuz i dont initiate the conversation first dosent mean u cant.
and thats my point flat out.
if we were besties how come it was always a one way street until i talked to u first then we held a conversation.
do u see where im coming from.
we both have the option to talk to each other and neither of us took it and thats why were in a fight.
and thats both of our faults not just one person.
now u see my point.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: miss feedmekicks. [RIP: JMD & SAT] BDAY: 8 days.
Date: Dec 6, 2008 9:48 PM

i didnt threaten you autumn. you get yourself into enough things, i dont even have to waste my time and throw threats.

& i do see your point. i just feel like theres no excuse for how you been acting.

i feel like theres no point in me trying to talk to u, if u aint doing the same.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: [[autumn christine ♥]]
Date: Dec 6, 2008 9:46 PM

i didnt and never did say i didnt do anything, i see ur point perfectly, but i could say the same thing for u.
but i dont want to make evrything an issue.
and u need to see where im coming from cuz i dont think u do.
and please dont threaten me its rude.
and u wudnt be feeling this way if u wud have come and talked to me when u started to feel like i was being a bitch. i cant read minds audrey. even if u were my best friend. and in my opinion im in my right mind. ive opened up my eyes. thats why ive decided we just need to be friends NOT besties cuz we have to many issues and we always fight and its just pointless. cuz im tired of the fights.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: miss feedmekicks. [RIP: JMD & SAT] BDAY: 8 days.
Date: Dec 6, 2008 9:35 PM

its funny how u just sit & think that you didnt do anything.

smh. if you talked & acted like a friend..i wouldnt be feelin this way.

but do u.

hopefully you get your mind right sooner than later.
id hate to see some fucked up things happen to someone ive cared about all this time.

when youre ready & willing to talk to me, trust me, and care about me the way i care about you- ill still be here to be your best friend.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: [[autumn christine ♥]]
Date: Dec 6, 2008 9:33 PM

i didnt cause shyt there u go blaming me again FRIENDSHIP IS A TWO WAYY STREET AUDGE. and thats my point. and we BOTH GREW UP AND GREW APART. i dont think we have anything in common anymore with each other. and thats why im choosing to just be friends now. im done with the bestie fights its irritating and it gets old just remeber i wont forget our memories no matter what happens and ill always remember u. not even if we never talk again.
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: miss feedmekicks. [RIP: JMD & SAT] BDAY: 8 days.
Date: Dec 6, 2008 9:26 PM

do what you want.

but reality check for your damn self: you caused all this & YOU are the one that changed.

i havent changed, i just grew up.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: [[autumn christine ♥]]
Date: Dec 6, 2008 9:18 PM

u were th only person i knew at the time who had her number.
and i needed it excuse me if i got deperate. and put urself out there?? how do u think i feel u never tell me anything EVER u never do now and u never used to like i did u. and the whle chase thing is cuz chase hasnt changed and i know how hes gonna react to whatever i say and i dont ask u to stck up for me for whatever reason cuz reality check i dont care what a bitch says about me its prolly as fake as them.
so dont make that an issue. and also i try well tried to talk to u in class and u jsut come off to me as u dont care what i have to say so i tell skye cuz she listens and dosent ignore me. maybe we have grown apart and we dont need to be besties maybe we should just be friends cuz obviously being besties is causing more problems. and dont sit there and say skyes my best friend cuz after u im done with besties its juvenile and were growing up its pointless to have besties cuz after high school u dont see anyone anymore anyways.
cuz i dont want any bad blood between us so maybe we should just be friends. deal?

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: miss feedmekicks. [RIP: JMD & SAT] BDAY: 8 days.
Date: Dec 6, 2008 9:05 PM

we both have changed since freshman year. i dont know how u can be scared to tell me stuff if im your best friend. it doesnt really matter. ive never judged you & i stay stickin up for you every time ppl say shit about you & you arent around.

& you just made my point clear. you keep it real with chase no matter what? but cant with me? yeah...see. its pretty much time to just let shit go. idk.

i never tell you anything anymore because you dont tell me things. i already knew u didnt tell me shit, so hey why would i put my self out there if u dont? makes no sense. im not gonna beg or kiss your ass to be my friend. & if i see that you arent being my friend, than im not gonna try.

& youre right. we dont got classes, but that means you should atleast try and talk to me in the class we do have. dont u think? idk. do what uw ant autumn. it doesnt matter. at semester i wont see anybody so i dont care.

& i blew up because u dont even txt me to talk, but you can text me and ask for some bitches number? THAT MAKES ALOT OF SENSE.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: [[autumn christine ♥]]
Date: Dec 6, 2008 8:58 PM

well last time we talked lots u told me u only have 1 day off so sorry if thats what i thought u never tell me ur schedule so how am i suppose to know.
and u never tell me anything either or u hardly do just like me.
and i dont tell u all the details cuz u've changed lots scnce freshman year and idk how u will react to what i'd be telling u now and i really am kind of scared to find out and idk why?? [[and i know it dsent make sense but its hard to explain]]
so thats why i tell skye or chase cuz i keep it real with chase no matter what it is just cuz thats chase nd skye well she just listens and it just seems like she understands where im coming from. and i had no idea ppl were acting like that i mean it wasnt all just my fault like u make it seem like. i mean i dont see why i have to approach u first with sumthing i mean it goes both ways. and we have no classes so naturally we wont be around esch other lots.
i mean i have the opportunity just as much as u do to talk to each other. like i said i dont see why i have to start the convo first. u know. cuz u never come up to me and tell me anything like i used to with u. just out of the blue.
and i knew u were mad but i figured if u had an issue u would come to me and talk to me like we used too but u never did so i thought we were cool then u jsut belw up on me when i asked u for skyes number.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: miss feedmekicks. [RIP: JMD & SAT] BDAY: 8 days.
Date: Dec 6, 2008 8:43 PM

well for one, i have 2 days off of work. i do work alot, but i got things to do & i need to help my mom with bills. you dont even know my schedule to know when or when i dont work. the reason why i acted like i didnt care is because u would sit & tell me one story WITHOUT details autumn & then turn around and tell the same story to skye or chase or someone else with ALL details. that hurt ME because we are supposed to be "best friends". it hurts me to have ppl i barely know walk up to me & be like "why arent u & autumn friends? why dont u & autumn talk? why dont i ever see autumn around u?"

it took alot from me to finally say that i dont feel like u are my best friend. yeah, its possible that we can be friends by not talking alot, but why would we not talk alot when we have the opportunity to talk autumn? it just makes me think that you can and should have a better or different best friend.

i WANT you to have other friends, but i dont want to be neglected by you when you do. it seems like udont understand how i feel. after a while, i just didnt care anymore & i never said nanything to u about it.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: [[autumn christine ♥]]
Date: Dec 6, 2008 8:37 PM

ok well im sorry for not talking to u a much as we used to and when i try to talk to u u act like im not there or u dont care what i have to say.
and u might not realize it but i do. and that hurts and that makes me sad how u can sit there and say u dont want to be my friend just cuz i dont talk to u that much.
and i put skye up there like that cuz i did what u wanted me too. if u notice i still have u up there and ur still on my page..and ok maybe i was a little mad. and u make it seem like i cant have other friends even if its not what ur intentions are. that is just what it comes off as to me.
and i hung out with her once and that was homecoming and thats cuz she had noone else to go with, and i had never hung out with her b4, ur always busy u say so urself its kind of hard to spend time with u in and out of school when u work alot and thats not ur fault, but u get what one day off, audge we dont live close anymore, so its gonna be harder to hang out. but u were real quick to just gve up on our friendship and thats why im mad cuz i love u audge and i never ment for it to seem like i hated u. but in my opinion we can be besties and not talk a lot cuz that just proves how strong our friendship is, but obviously it wasnt as strong as i thought.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: miss feedmekicks. [RIP: JMD & SAT] BDAY: 8 days.
Date: Dec 6, 2008 8:26 PM

no rachel isnt gonna be my new best friend. i really dont care whos best friend he is to be honest. but for someone who is still gonna keep me as thier best friend, you sure were quick to put skye up there. its not about who you talk to hun, its about you NOT talking to me. i never said uu couldnt have firends. and thats now what this is about autumn. dont turn it into something its not. i dont care if you talk to skye, thats cool that you do because shes my friend too. the problem i have is of you not talking to me. thats all.

and im not saying you are a bad friend. i never said that at all. hun, please dont put words in my mouth. but for some reason u can call, hang out, and everyhting else with her- but not me. seems silly. dont u think?

and thats good that you wanna keep whatedever you want on your page. im not saying you arent my best friend. you made it seem that way..

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: [[autumn christine ♥]]
Date: Dec 6, 2008 8:18 PM

see now thats childish because im not blowing out of proportion like u audge.
first off if u werent so worried about me u wudnt be lookin at my page so hard.
and secondly a thought just occured to me...what about racheal is she gonna be ur new bestie?? cuz oh yea u talk to her just as much as i talk to skye maybe even more.
and also i dont know why u seem to think i talk to skye so much i actually dont talk to her outside of school, unlike u probly do with racheal. so i dont see how once agan its all my fault why were not besties when u made the same decisions i did.
u said urself u see her more than me so stop tripping and have her be ur best friend.
but that might be a problem cuz shees bekkas bestie too. so aww thats too bad.
and also after this semester i wont see skye or prolly talk to her cuz we have differnt classes.
and what about that one talk we had that no matter how much we talk to pther people well still be besties and not trip over it...huh??
oh maybe u forgot, so that just shows how good of a friend u are if u can forget something we talked about.
but oh no im the bad friend here.
so i just dont see how its all my fault and just wanted to clear that up and also ill keep whatever i want on my page cuz even if im not ur bestie ur still mine cuz im not about to forget and let go of all our memories idc how far we grow apart because that would be below me.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: miss feedmekicks. [RIP: JMD & SAT] BDAY: 8 days.
Date: Dec 6, 2008 7:41 PM

too bad you forgot to change your page.
make sure it says "my best friend is: skye mapes"

wouldnt wanna take too much credit from your friend =|




It's almost that time...

It's truely almost that time to actually start looking on to see the relationships with my friends and how they really are. I cannot tell you who to be friends with and/or who to hang with, but don't say some crazy shit just so it seems like you understand me. Don't say that you don't want a certain friend or you aren't close to that friend & they just don't know it UNLESS you mean it. There's a few of you, ONE I'm zoning in on, that say stuff like this. Claim that you are or aren't close to a person and thenact different. It's old. That's how you lose friends. Seriously.

I know I can't hog all the friendship out of you, but don't tell me that I'm your best friend and then act totally different.

That's shady.



I got my check stub last night.

and I was pissed after seeing it.
I mean, I know that I took days off & stuff to go out of town, but dannng.
I don't understand. Why does things like this have to happen to me?

I can't buy Jessica the present I wanted to get her for Christmas. She gets everything she wants. I don't know.

It makes me angry. I try to do nice things and it never works out.




I think it's ignorant how almost every young person thinks it's cool to drink and/or do drugs. It's really not even cool. The same thing I've been telling my friends for atleast 3 years now, they are now realizing.

"I recently found out that getting high isn't cool anymore"

ARE YOU SERIOUS?! It was NEVER cool. Why can't people just live life & have a good time without shit like alcohol & weed? It sucks that I have to distance myself from people just because they can't simply live life. It doesn't make any sense.



I am not motivated. I really don't care about this class. This class being creative writing, sucks right now. I can't even get enough energy to do the stupid ass book that I am supposed to be doing. I am missing like 2 other stories and I just don't know why the EFF I cannot get in the mood to write. It sucks, because I wanted to do good in this class. I really did. It was like...something to help me get more creative and stuff. Pretty much all I have done in this class is- made a new friend. Her name is Danielle. She's super cool. She's pretty too, like a lion. Whenever I think about her, I think about her lion hair picture on Myspace. She's got a lip piercing, which I absolutely love. I adore it! JEEZ.

Anyways, for some reason I feel like talking about Danielle. She's purty. :)

& I feel bad for Corrie because she needs this credit. we haven't been doing what we should in this class. It sucks.


I love Jessica. I cannot describe how much I enjoy her! She's super cool!

As if you guys didn't know, my birthday is in 12 days. I'm going to be 18, but besides that, Jessica got me a wonderful pre-gift. I know, I know. You are probably asking the same things as myself. WHAT THE HELL IS A PRE-GIFT FOR?! I guess it's just for fun. It's for making Audrey feel bad because Jess spent too much money! She got me some wonderful Victoria's Secret perfume & a shirt. <33


13 DAYS.

yeah, you read it right.

13 days until the big ONE-EIGHT.

I am super excited for tunring 18. It should be fun.

I'm planning a dinner. Dinner with Jessica & Rachel.

I hope it turns out okay. Even though, there's some kinks in the plan.


So, since I can't seem to add comments to my friends' blogs, (except Shantae's)I will leave the comments in my post. ha!

RACHEL: I know it's hard, and you can always count on me. I love you, and I can't sit here and say that I completely understand what you are going through because I don't, but what I do know is that I will be a friend to you no matter what. The situation with you & Stephen has to have some type of blessing in it, one way or another. I wish we could go visit that church guy again. He would make us feel better. It sucks seeing you sad. I hate it! I wish I could make you happy some-how. You looked super pretty with your purple-ish pink-ish eye shadow on today. * We laughed. I told you I would buy you 500 MAC blushes. PS: You guy's she's stealing my college funds! GOD DAMMIT! :)

JESSICA: I LOVE YOU TO DEATH! Thank you for being the amazing person that you are. You have done a lot for me and I definately thank you.