I cancelled that junk!

Kidddding. I'm not canceling it, but I do think that I'm setting myself up for failure by saying that I will post a word each day. I do intend on still expanding my vocabulary, though. So I am going to make a side little section, so that I can still post up words, when I get around to it. Soooo, stay tuned for that little snippet of action there now. Until then...

ANYWHO! It's really hot in this room. I almost think that I want to be a photographer. Isn't that silly? My younger brother wants to be a photographer. I ran into a few new flickr photostreams that are absolutely amazing. Hopefully, with their permission, I will be sharing some of the photos with my fellow bloggers.

Has anyone ever told you that something you wore was really ugly? That's happened to me, alot. But it sucks about 17 times more when you actually LOVE what you are wearing. Something of that nature happened to me today. I tried a new hairstyle aside from what I usually do with it, & amongst a few too many "your hair is cute" compliments, I got a very shiesty one. I had a friend of mine tell me that my hair was "not working for me".

REALLLLY?! You can't be serious. All of a sudden all of these words just came rushing out of my mouth. I found myself apologizing for my hair and how it really wasn't meant to come out that way. But in all actuality, IT WAS! I was so mad at myself because I loved my hair. I really loved it.

that pretty much shot my whole self esteem down for the entire day. Sadly....

I'll post a picture of it, some time soon, whenever I happen to upload pictures.


I love this woman & her photos!

Here's just a glimpse of what she does.

You can find her flickr page, here:
Alyssa Michele.

Her photos are cue and simplistic. AMAZING! If I do say so myself. I just discovered her and I'm not sure if she is a photographer, or just takes those photos from the net. I'm thinking she's a photographer, but I could be wrong. These things fascinate me. How can such a simple design make things so beautiful and perfect?


I cannot even begin to explain the issue I have with people now saying "go kill yourself" and other harsh things of that manner. Not only does it make you look stupid, but it makes me LOATHE you. I lost a friend, and it makes me absolutely want to SCREAM when people say ignorant things like that. Yeah, you might think it's funny or whatever- but at the end of the day nobody is laughing when someone they love is hurt or even dies. Since July of this year, I've grown into someone I never thought I would be. Someone seirous and actually MATURE. Well, I've always been mature, but really...I never fathomed people dying and losing someone, ect, ect.

Over the summer, my friend passed away. News reporters went wild with the story. I don't feel the need for details. He was drunk. No seatbelt. Speeding. Yeah, all of those ARE true, but there's a reason why he was speeding and drunk. He was drunk because teeens party! I'm not saying that teen drinking is something that I condone. It's actually NOTHING I condone. I've never been drunk in my life, and I really don't plan on it, but alot of my friends do it & I know that parents of most of us have been engaged in under-age drinking. He was speeding because he was angry. Angry that he had just defended his friends' CHILD EXPECTING girlfriend. Why was he defending her? Because his friend was hitting her. Yeah, look into things deeper before you assume. Assuming on a certain news board, went out of hand. A supposed police chief's wife, the police chief that was on the scene, was slaying Michael Driggers' family with the hurtful words that were displayed on the newsboard.

This link will take you to the article on the newsboard.

Teen Killed In Weekend Crash.

Although, time has passed and I feel better about myself, when this first happened NOBODY wanted to see the hurtful things that were said about Mike. These people who never knew him were talking down on the whole situation. Obviously, we all knew the circumstances should have never happened, BUT the fact is- THEY DID. It was a hard time, and the people who loved Mike had to read these hurtful things. I just want it to be known that Mike was never a violent type of person, he was never unhappy, he NEVER had enemies.

This has been bugging me. All of this. I'm sorry if I seem like I'm over-the-top ranting, but Mike's family and friends don't deserve to be put through this.

Rest In Peace Michael Driggers.



I absolutely hate people who text l!k3 +h!$

It sucks. I know that texting is supposed ot be a fast way to communicate, and shortened words and the ideal form of texting, but i HATE when people text in super difficult to read ways. Like when people are too lazy to type the letter O, they just substitute it with a zero. ;sdlkg;dflsgh' I HATE THAT. Don't text me if that's how you text. It's annoying and it takes me like 5 years to read a few words.


Halloween plans this year are pretty good so far. I have a Halloween party to go to, but it isn't actually ON Halloween. I need to find my skull hoody to wear. EKKKK. Anyways, Friday after school I went shopping. I didn't intend, nor NEED to buy shoes, but knowing me- I did. They are the 2008 Halloween nike dunks glow in the dark edition.

Anyways, my cousin Cassie got the same one. I'm not too happy about it, but she likes them so I guess that's all that matters. I have a feeling that these shoes don't glow in the dark, though. Cassie's don't so I'm hoping she just got the crap end of the stick.



That Ne-Yo song "Mad", off his new album called Year of the Gentleman, is amazing!

Just a little sidenote for you, though.

Anyways, my weekend was almost terrible. I didn't hardly get anything accomplished, worked my BUTT off, and finally realized that math just isn't for me.

Let's backtrack. My friday was going well until I had to put up with my mom's BS. She's been in a really bad mood lately, which kind of sucks. Ahh well....I'm the one who's got to put up with it & it really does suck. Seriously.

I always plan ahead, but when it comes down to it, I never get anything done that I planned. I take that back, i usually get like one thing done, but it's usually the easiest most simple thing on my to-do list. Like this weekend, for example. I had plans on putting away clothes, doing laundry, getting caught up on my math, and cleaning my room. What did I actually do? Spent all of Friday shopping, spending money I had no business spending, stayed up all night on Myspace, and I did get my room straightened up a little. Not anything close to what I wanted. I tried to stay at work as late as possible this weekend. It sucks because I hate being at work, but I know my mom needs money. That's a whole nother story though.

Anyways, I got my fantastic homecoming dress, but I don't really plan on revealing details. I want it to end up being a suprise. I think alot of people will be blown away, considering I've never been the real girly type.



Today started off bad, but ended amazingly.

I got the PERFECT homecoming dress. THanks to my wonderful cousin Cassie. I'm also super excited about her Halloween party. I want one of my friends to come, or more, but I'm not sure who will come. That's not important.

Anyways...I'm happy I can finally blog about something besides the drama that's been swallowing my entire soul!

Today was the first time I had ever been to Olive Garn, and man oh man did I love it! Thier breadsticks are FANTASTIC and the pasta I was delicious. I can't wait to go again another time. It was pure heaven.

I shopped. I got some new shoes. I wanted to post a picture up here,but I'll save that for later because I'm too lazy to upload ANYTHING.

Corrie. Each and everyday I figure out that I pretty much love this girl. It's silly to say, but I really am glad that we got classes together. Corrie is an amazing person. I want to grow closer to her and be a GREAT friend to her. I hope this year is amazing for both of us. We bring snacks for each other. It's fun. I wish we could have been friends since way back when, and not lost touch, but things happen and what's done is done.

I heard that during your last high school years is when you figure out who your real friends are. You learn who is going to stay in your life, and who was never meant to be there. You learn life lessons that you can only learn from getting your feelings hurt. I wish that I could take back all of the mean things I've EVER said to people. Sometimes people just make it hard to be nice and kind to them. They use you as a pawn, a game piece, and move you around like it's thier piece. People will come and go, and you will regret it someday, but you have to remember what that person taught you. I'm a firm believer in GOd, and I feel that if God doesn't feel like you need to learn anything from that person- they will guide them to someone elses' life besides your own. I've had a few friends guided away from me and it really does suck.

I think about Michelle Vidlak and Kathleen Klaumann all the time. These two people made an impression on my life that I will never forget. I adore them for making me the person I am today, and I wish I could have kept them closer in my life. I hope GOd grants me the serenity to follow the right paths and not push people away from me.


All of it.

I take every NICE, un-rude thing I've ever said to or about this girl.
She's a rude bitch. Seriously. I'm not even trying to exaggerate ANYTHING.

Nobody can honestly know the whole situation between us, but some people know alot of it.

She doesn't deserve a friend like me. She's rude, self-centered, promiscious, and not sincere at all.

She's just....lame. Really lame. Seriously.

I want to curse and call her every filthy name that I know, and do scandalous things to her- but I can't. I mean...I can, but that wouldn't be right AT ALL.

It's hard to look back and see that for 5 years she really thought this way about me, but never said it. She said so many mean things, and now I sit here and think "That's the real way she has felt since day one." How can you fake the funk that bad! How can you take five years of someones secrets, time, laughs, and situations and think totally garbage of them?

Despite what she says OR thinks, I am going to college. I am going to be something in life. I am NOT going to live with my mom forever.

THat's all, really.

WORD OF THE DAY 9/26/08.

i SERIOUSLY find it funny that this word, just like yesterdays word, matches whats going on in my life.

melee \MAY-lay; may-LAY\, noun:
1. A fight or hand-to-hand struggle in which the combatants are mingled in one confused mass.
2. A confused conflict or mingling.

life example: after the melee between audrey and shara, shara found herself at the hospital. :)



I recently had a post about an addition to my blog.

The addition is the word of the day, let's see if my readers can help me keep up the work from doing this.

The website I will be using is: www.dictionary.com.

If you choose to start a vocabulary expanding excursion, PLEASE try and find another website. I don't mind, and surely encourage, oyu learning but how can I do it if you are using the same material?

Tis all.



Why are soap operas so popular? Have you ever sat and watched an episode of a soap opera? Personally, I've never sat and watched a soap opera. Each melodramatic character, their lives' ever-so-changing, never reaching a dull moment in life. How can that be? Who comes up with these people? One character, an elderly woman, never having a dull moment? That sounds like pure bologna to me, if I do say so myself. That same woman, having these series of events, that not even the Incredible Hulk goes through during an entire lifetime? Who thinks of these people?! Who sits and makes these soap operas? Aren't they supposed to be like...reality and stuff? yet they make peoples' lives seem like an on-going rollercoaster. I'm sure that some people, most people, have a bunch of events that happen to them, but not like THAT. Seriously.

I found this blog topic idea on a random site that I found through the Google seach engine.


Simple? Have you ever stopped and smelled the fresh air? Really, you have? Okay, have you ever stopped and smelled the fresh air, and THEN tried to describe the way it smells? Probably not. I know that simple things are taken for granted by many people, OFTEN. You should totally do that...as soon as I leve this classroom, I'm defiantely putting that at the top of my priority list.

Serious note...school and college? I had my senior check yesterday with Mr. Whiley. He made me feel like I wasn't doing anything to prepare myself for college. Isn't he supposed to make me feel safe and READY for college? Now, I feel even more like I am not ready! I feel like I'm way behind of everyone else! I feel like I should just give up!

Math class.Let's not even begin there because I can't stand that class. Not only do I NOT understand, but I really hate the teacher. It seems like he doesn't really care if you understand or not. Seriously.

I'm not in a ranting mood now, though. Simply because I took a three hour nap. I'm supposed to try and bake something for me and Corrie tomorrow, but my luck- she won't come to school. SHUCKS!



i decided, that i want to expand my damned vocabulary.
i went to a website, that set me up for this new-found addition to my blog.
learning new words can only help, and never hurt.

so, in turn, im adding my word of the day section. im hoping that i can just add a word of the day section to my daily post, but if not- ill always just post about the word.

edify \ED-uh-fy\, transitive verb:
To instruct and improve, especially in moral and religious knowledge; to teach.--edifying, adjective

wow. can it get ANY better? i feel like edifying is what i need to do. i feel like edifying is basically what i blogged about in my last post. ^_^


ive recently ended and fueled a beef with a friend that's been in my life for about five years. i'm more pissed off, than anything. pissed off about everything this situation has become and how it's become this way. all over money? i NOW believe the saying- money is the root of all evil. people cange, become a different person when money is involved. i cannot sit here and say that i havent changed since ive had a job for longer than a year, but what i can say is that- ive NEVER dissed my friends for money. never in life would i do some shit like that. it disgusts me because i liked shara. we had never been in a fight, arguement, and have spent many times together including the jonas brothers concert, a few homecomings, and every birthday party of mine. really, i need to look past who she is now and remember who she was before and why she became my friend in the begining. all i know is that i want to come out on top in this situation. i want to come out being the better perosn. i AM the bigger person in this situation and i know that whatever it takes from me, will have to be enough.

i noticed alot of things. during the summer, everyone was telling me to enjoy my senior year because it will fly past. they also mentioned that this year, you will start to figure out who your real friends are. all i know, is that i dont want to burn bridges that dont need to be burned, but stop traveling them so often. that is my goal. i dont want to have lingering beef with shara and have it escalade into something it isnt. we have all changed over the years, especially as we are becoming adults now. im ready to mend and mold, mend the friendshipos, and mold my new ones. im not saying its time to punk out, or anything like that but what i am saying, is that i dont want to have awkward moments with people who have been there for me atleast once when i needed them.



WHY am i randomly reading peoples blogs?
WHY am i sitting in math not paying attention?
WHY am i not understanding this math in the first place when i have been trying so hard.
WHY cant i figure my life out?
WHY cant my friends just be friends, and stop looking for a hand to feed from?
WHY cant family be family without betraying you?
WHY cant i make more money at work?
WHY do i feel like i need to talk?
WHY do i feel like nobody understands?
WHY cant mike just come back?
WHY isnt there enough time in the day?

Please, just tell me why.



did you ever stop and wonder about what your identity will become? not your identity as in, who you are: birthdate, race, ect, ect. but identity as in: person you are inside. today in english we were discussing the current novel we are reading. the book started off bad, but in the end it was an okay book.

back to subject, though...

right now, i know myself as a young adult who works alot and uys many, many pairs of shoes. in the next few years how will that change? will people percieve me differently? thinking back i know that i percieved myself way differently back in freshman year. i was young, naive, and not as mature as i am now. i dressed differently. i was a tom-boy and i didnt know anything about working or how many comes and goes. that has all changed now. i work, get stressed, am going to be going off to college soon. its all a bunch of things. im sure there are more obvious and less-obvious things that have happened since freshman year ot make me change, but when you really sit down and think about it- its CRAZY!



she is absolutely amazing. <3

it means alot for me to know that i have people who CAR about me.


this is FUNNY right?


dont ask me what it is. i found it on the desktop of my creative writing class.
amazing how ignorant, yet creative people can seem.


i havent blogged in a few days, well i have- but nothing too meaningful enough to actually read. lets start it all off...

SCHOOL: school has been hectic. i had trouble with deciding on if i should actually register for my ACT or not, considering i just might go to a community college. When i finally decided to do it, i was excited. i know its going to be hard, but eff it. i need to do this. anyways, i convinced myself...and THEN things were going wrong. it was rough but today, i finally finished the registration for my ACT, right on time. my creative writing class has given me more than i can chew. it seems as if i just took that class because it sounded fun, but when i looked at the course title again, i noticed the course was actually called "HONORS ADVANCED creative writing". like WTFF was i thinking?! anyway, the class is cool, but the length of the paoers is ridiculous to me.

I missed ONE DAY of school and i feel like ive been totally left in the dust in my algerba 5-6 class. its TOO ridiculous. ive always struggled with math, but hopefully i can stay on top of my game.

It doesnt sound too overwhelming, but with working- it is! Which leads me to my next subject...

WORK: Work isnt okay! During the summer i was working atleast 40 hours a week, 6 days a week. I was used to those big checks every 2 weeks. Now my checks are practically cut in HALF and i still feel like im working a ton. i think its jsut because of school. Theres not really any drama going on at work, things are going good.

HOMECOMING: Our homecoming is October 11th. The theme is "reality TV", which isnt the best theme, but ehhh. I still do not know if i am for sure going. Even though, it seems like all my friends are going. I just dont got the money for nails, dress, shoes, ect, ect. i know i can make it work with the money ive got, but i just need to be convinced. Ive already taken that saturday off of work, so either way i got a free saturday. chill with me? :)

FRIENDS: i have alot to say in this area of discussiion. if you know me personally, you know that theres bene alot of dramatics going on with my friends...

I feel like this person is turning really rude since she's gotten certain things over the summer. she even went so low as to go and eat before she came and picked me up from school, just so she didnt have to pay for my breakfast. which, without details, sounds like thats what anybody would do, but the thing is i had already bought breakfast TWICE and she had said she was going to buy it a second time as well. I havent really said anything because this person takes me back and forth to school- with gas money from me, though. theres been a few other incidents with her that i havent been too thrilled about, but i havent said anything because i dont want drama to occur, even though its eating me alive!

Im happy to report that i have been getting closer to more people than just my best friend this year! thats what i wanted to do. this is my senior year and i want to meet as many new people that i can, so that i can esatblish life long friendships. all is good in this area. theres this girl, Celeste. Shes really cool. Im glad that i met her. Then theres Corrie. Corrie and I have always known each other for a few years, but this year it seems like we will actually get to know erach other. Shes been my main compadre. My main human diary. Shes really cool, and I wish we would have stayed on talking terms, but... :) I also been tlaking to my old friend, Brittany. Shes cool, and mature. Glad to know someone like her. ALl in all, i hope that i can keep in touch with these people and make them stay in my life.

My internet friend population has been skyrocketing lately. Im not sure if its because ive joined a few new sites or if its because of whom ive been tlaking to OR if its because i went on a request friend rampage. Either way it goes, I really enjoy these people. They make my life less boring, and my inet time goes more smoothly.

I think i should end this post, ive typed alot. please let me know what you think. if you want more details on any of these subjects, let me know.

-look me up on social vibe: miss feedmekicks; link is to the right.
-talk to me on myspace: www.myspace.com/feedmekicks; link to the right.
-add me on facebook: name- Audrey Thompson; link soon to come.
-yahoo! messenger: feedmekicks; talk to me there!
-AIM messenger: miss feedmekicks; talk there too.

*PS: if you know any links to sites where i can get anything photoshop, brushes, fonts, tutorials, ect please let me know.



i dont really have much of a post today.

well, i do, but im just really sleepy right now.

let me just advertise a moment...



im super happy that everyone likes my nice little layout, made by a friend of mine.

im not happy that i didnt make it, i do want to change it to something that i made.

i think my blog resembles a few other peoples', and not to piss anyone off, but i dont like that.



Seriously? For what? Why is there always someone in the group that's got something to say? Not only do they have something to say, but they aren't bold enough to say the shit... So, they wait until they think you can't hear them. Doesn't that sound silly? How BOLD do you gotta be to do something like that? Actually, I think you're super fucking bold for putting your opinions out that way, instead of saying it so I know you're talking to me...That makes it so much better when i ACTUALLY hear your dumbass and you still sit and try to act like nothing was being said...

You're wack...seriously.
This post WAS pointless to you, but to me- it wasn't.
YOUR gay as fuck and mad because he doesn't have the Notebook dunks. Point Blank.



my layout looks really nice. big shouts to mara who helped spice up my blog, hopefully it will attract more in my area or blog. i do want to learn how to do things myself, on this site. i guess it will take time and effort. i do know that school and work has been taking up a huge amount of my time. winter is coming so, that might give me more time considering the fact that i hate snow and coldness.

update on what reading material ive been reading.
i did finish the book "Go Ask Alice", and i pretty much enjoyed the entire book. if you aren't familliar with this book, you should definately check it out. its about a young girl, and i mean young, who goes through that rebel stage of life with her parents and she does some really bad things. i don't want to give too much away, so i'm just gonna shut up about it. it was a good book, though on the contrary.

i am looking for new material to read, if anyone has anything they suggest, go ahead and post a comment please ^_^



Who ever said that you can't make super cool internet friends? I totally met this new females named Mara. She's really awesome, despite my first impression- which, by the way, was completely wrong of her! She's super cool and keeps me laughing! It's almost funny how the internet can hold so many "friendships". Ahh, well. I don't want to ramble, just wanted to get it all out.

Look to the left to find her link.




For some odd reason, I really cannot shake this whole Keri Hilson phase. I mean, she's amazing! There's really just something about her voice that makes me want to be just like her :) She has amazing style, down to earth lyrics, and a voice eyond amazing. I think she's a good artist, and even though some people are just now hearing about her- she's been out & about for a while. I think she kind of missed out on alot of potential stardom because of her record label not pushing her projects. I think Blaque kind of went through the same thing, along with other R&B sonstresses. ie: Tierra Mari

Picture Source: http://kerihilsoncentral.com

Anyway, I'm excited that I was kind of thrown into this whole blogging thing. I've met a few cool people who I think could be really good people to have by my side in the long run. I think it's an awesome way to show creativity, not only with what I write, but also with the Photoshop designs. I'm really looking forward to this whole event of blogging :)



Besides being sick, I had a good day. I didn't go to school because I have a sinus cold, but that really didn't put a hurt on the 2nd half of my day.

I started off the day sleeping. I pretty much fell in and out of sleep all damn day! It sucked really bad, simply because I don't like spending my days sleeping. Don't get me wrong, I love sleep, but I don't think life was meant to just sleep away. After that, I got around to taking a shower and straightening my room a little, ect,ect- the mornal stuff.

I went out with Rachel! It was super fun. I hadn't went out in a few weekends, simply because I work and stuff and I don't want too much going on to make me tired. Plus, I don't want to associate myself with too many females or males who are going to end up turning out to be a fake friend. I generally keep to myself, for lack of words.

Anyway, I had a blast with Rach. We found her a really cute homecoming dress. The lady at the store was kinda picking out creepy looking dresses at first, but in the end we found a really cute one. Rachel will look THE BOMBB in her new dress. :)

After dress shopping, I realized that I have no idea what I'm going to wearfor homecoming. I know that I kind of want to wear a dress, but I'm not sure. I seen some really cute ones at Debs. I'll figure something out, though.

Next, we went to a MAC counter, which kind of made me sad because I think I'm ugly and I know NOTHING about make-up. Rachel is this sexy little mama who knows EVERYTHING about make-up. GRRRRRR. But yeah, she got this really cute nail polish and some eye shadow. Later on, I found out that she bought black. I was totally feeling dumb because I heard her tell the lady she wanted "carbon" and I'm sittin here like "Rachel, I didn't know you got black". Yeah....

Then we went to Wendy's. Nothin special there....We just talked alot.

We left Wendy's. Rachel drove the wrong way. ^_^

Then we went and snuck up on Stephen! How cool. Rachel should've listened to me when I told her where he was.

Anyways, on a good note- here's us:


i finally joined.

i am now raising money for our environment, supported by nike.



I've had alot of people ask me about my backpack, where I got it, how much I paid, ect, ect.

I'm kind of tired of explaining it. So for the real serious inquiries.....

This is the backpack. It was done by an actual friend of mine, who does urban clothing for a cheap price. He can do many different things,but usually uses clothing paint. He mostly does tees and shoes, but obviously I'm sure he will do anything he can do, basically. He's a real cool person, and is eager to get his work spread around. He's done shirts for many people, and has been many different places in the world, yet he's still a real down to earth character.

You can reach Trendz @ www.myspace.com/trendz305

Here's a picture of Trendz and myself. He also made the shirts we are holding. He's a real good person, and he trys to make things convient for whomever. So if you really are interested, hit his link and tell him what you are interested in.


I think alot of people might be confused by what this blog is...

TYPICALLY, the people I know are bloggers on thier own. I started off blogging on my own, but I had no idea about how to make it look nice and cool and ect ect.

So I stopped...

I started my senior year, and I had to blog everyday. Instead of doing it by hand, or start another journal type of blog- I reclcyled this one.

The posts are a little more formal than normal simply because my teacher CAN view them. She doesn't sit her happy self down and peek at them, but she does have to scan over them every once in a while.

BUTTTTT, I am learning more about the whole coding and such of blogger. I WILL be more in-tune with my updates and I will use it more frequently.

I have been subscribing to a few peoples blogs, people I may know, may not know, and people that I just think seem to have good opinions and such.

SO, if I subscribed to you.... get ot know me. Unless you already do.



I tried to stop her.....


Today started off as like the worst day ever. I gues my little brother doesn't know how to stay awake when I wake him up in the morning. This has happened like THREE times. THREE! EFFIN' THREE! ads'fljka;dfl. Can you not imagine how I feel? I get super P.O'ed because it's a job of mine to wake him up so he doesn't miss his bus. Then he says he's awake, and IS physically awake, but THEN continues to go BACK to sleep. Like....seriously...

I was totally going to type about this dude Bob O'COnner who is obviously a FANTASTIC photographer, but Corrie is being a lame and won't let me...

Too bad for her because I'm going to type about him anyway...

So, there's this dude named Bob O'Conner. He is an amazing photographer. He takes all of these photos that symetrical. I don't really know. Anyway, he's cool at what he does. Since Corrie is having a seisure next to me..I gotta stop typing about Bob. :(

PS: Sorry Bob! I totally wanted to rave about how awesome you were and stuff. I totally wanted to promote your well-being, but NOOOOOOOOOOOOO Corrie Brown is a killer. A promotion killer.



I feel like there's too many situations where you take life for granted. There's alot of people who take lfe as if it's a plan, but really it's not. You have to live each day. Don't spend your life planning things out.

If we are personally close, you probably know that I lost someone real close to me this summer. It hurts, but time heals everything. That's a line I feel you should live by. Honestly, people are special to you. ost of the people you associate yourself with are special to you, even people I haven't talked to in years are special to me. If/When you loose someone, you are never prepared. You are never prepared to have someone leave your life. It's beyond belief how many memories you can all of a sudden recall after you loose someone.

Please, Please, PLEASE do not take life for granted. Tell people you love them every single day. Hug your mom everytime you walk out of her sight. In the end, it will all be better.


I kind of just noticed that I hate change. Change is really bad to me, especially change that I dislike. I dislike this whole change in Creative Writing class. This is bad because I really liked my other seat. I liked it because I kind of liked the person that sat next to me, she took the initiative to talk to me. I got used to that. I also had this awesome big screen and flat keyboard. It was AMAZING! I loved it. Now I sit clear across the room. I dislike that because I liked the window seat. I also liked being closer to the front. This is sad to me. Now I sit on the other side of the room, by the dreary off-white colored wall. I don't sit in the front. I have TWo people beside me, which kind of sucks because I was already weary with one by my side. I hate when people read my writing. It sucks. Plus, I'm not too comfortable in this class, yet. I also got this wack keyboard which really irks my nerves. I really liked the flat ones. They were too cool! I kinda got used to the little clickity-click noise they made when you typed on them.

Overwhelmed is the word I'm feeling right now.

So, I feel like this day is only half great. I learned that my best friend's stepmom and dad hate me. WHY?! Because of something she said. We always get into fights, but this time I guess it was worse.

Really the situation is dumb, and she thought I reacted in a a**hole type of way, but I didn't. Well, maybe I did, but I didn't mean to.



I hate the rain. Rain is one of the biggest inconviences I've had to live with since...since forever. It's raining now, which is why I had to rant about this. It's annoying.

Anyways, I feel like school is already in the swing of things, but has just gotten started. We haven't been in school a month yet and there's already super amounts of drama and fighting, not only between me but between everyone around me. I thought senior year was supposed to make us above that? Apparently not. It's hard when you really hate drama, and are RARELY in it, but you someonw keep becoming a part of it. It really sucks because I don't like being in the middle of drama. It causes way too much stress. I've been having a few too many mishaps with my bestfriend and it kind of aggrivates me. I don't want to put too much out on the table, after all the whole net can see this. Wouldn't want to make a huge war over something simple that I typed unconsciously....

I'm just really sick of drama and I really wish that it could all just go away.

OH YEAH! I have made a few friends along the way this year. No, not new people, but old people that I really hadn't liked before, I'm finding out aren't really so bad.



I think that people always try and put on a show for other people. Almost everyone does it. Granted, sometimes it might make you feel good to get compliments or attention or whatever, but you shouldn't just do things to please someone else. Thi is kind of an attatchment to my last post. I feel like I had a few more thigns to say on this topic. Too many people do it! I see it pretty much everyday. I am no hero, and I'm not ocmpletely unique or anti-conformity, but what i do know is that I don't try to live my life as if putting on a show for everyone. That's just not cute nor attractive whatsoever.

I know there's alot of things that make people want to be normal, or what they think is normal. I know that it's harsh in this world, and people are usually heartless. I know that it's hard ot have all eyes on you and have people stare at you funny. It just really sucks to see people be a part of a conformed community because they are afraid to show thier true colors. We could have an amazing fashion designer in our local area, but she or he might be too shy to show thier true colors, so we might never know.



Isn't it weird to think that you could possibly be living your own life for someone else? I heard a story about someone today. No names will be mentioned or the whole situation, but pretty much; this girl is living her life for her boyfriend who is full of drama and doesn't do anything for her. She tried killing herself because of something that occured between them. It got me thinking...do people really do that kind of thing? The answer is YES! Now, this chick went to the extremes, but everyone lives for someone else, whether it's alot or just a little. Have you ever done, said, or wore something that you knew would get a look or word from someone else? That's living for someone else. If you strive off of peoples' compliments and words, then you are living for someone else, not only yourself. I know I parcially live for someone else. Not only do you live for one person, but you live for many different people! That kind of thing seems so crazy and out of range, but it's totally true.



Do you ever wonder what people really think of you? How many times someone you consider to be your friend says something foul about you? I see it all the time. Pretty much everyday. Someone has a friend, and as soon as they aren't around them the tables are turned. Really, I'm starting to wonder how many people do that to ME! I can only hope that my "friends" dont take my kindness for weakness. I think that this world really isn't sympathetic to any kind of feelings. It's hard to find people who actually care about things, and aren't just materialistic. I mean, I know I'm a hypocrite, but I'm not as materialistic as alot of people. I can only hope that I don't turn into some materialistic person, that truely hates who she is.

I'm starting to ramble now...

I haven't even started my new Eglish assignment, which really sucks because I should have! I only have Thursdays and Fridays off, so now tomorrow I gotta work and then I won't want to do any homework. :)



I got new shoes today. It made me really happy. This blog is really just an update on things.

I'm going to make a list.

*My bestfriend is slacking in school.
*I found a new hot spot for kicks.
*I have every single Friday off of work.
*I want a new piercing already.
*I think school isn't so bad this year.
*I wish I was skinny.
*I love the book I'm reading.
*I really hate B day lunches.




Why the heck am I so cold?! I really don't understand why this school has to be so darn cold!  I haven't been warm all day! Isn't this bad for your health or something?  I really don't even think I can concentrate like this.  My goodness.  I swear that it shouldn't be this cold inside a building.  

Have you ever wondered why it's so easy to expect things from your friends, but so hard to give the exact same?  I found out that it's easy to expect an apology from a certain friend, but it's so hard to come to terms with yourself and actually doing the EXACT thing you'd expect from them.  I learned that it's hard for me to apologize, even if I know I should be the one apologizing, but it's really easy for me to expect or want an apology in the same instance.  It's easy for you to get mad about something, but it's harder to understand why another person is mad, even if it is about the same situation.  It's kind of hypocritical to me, but at the same time it's true.  

I've been thinking a lot about how friends are.  You can't really even trust your friends, well most of them.  I honestly think there's only one person I can really trust, and that is my best friend Autumn.  Autumn is the only person I trust, and even though I have other friends, I just feel like I cannot completely trust anyone.  I can look at other friends of mine and watch as they talk behind their "best friends" back, with no hesitation.  In the same instance, I wonder if my "friend" talks about me that same way.  It sucks that people can't even be real and honest with their friends, but that's reality.

I've also been shown full-handedly that money changes people.  Money changes everyone.  Money doesn't always change everyone for the worst, but usually that's the case.  I know a few of my close friends that have changed for the worse since they have been impacted upon by money.  Money is the root of all evil, truely.  

PS: Today is Corrie Brown's birthday and she is NOT here! How suckish is that?  I was going to bake her a cake, but I didn't pull through.  



It's had it's ups and downs, but more ups than downs. I think school work has gotten off to an okay start, I basically understand everything except for math. UGH! I'm glad that I can start new friendships, and get this year going.

I had a bat in my room today. It was pretty scary. It sucked because that was the second time. Seriously, let's get this thing figured out because I'm scared! Goshhh!

I also heard from someone today that they actually heard the whole "Audrey thinks she's black" rumor. That makes me laugh, I thought people wer over that. Really, I do not think I'm black. Honest to God, there's white girls who act WAY MORE black than me. Everyone has a little thug in them =]



I haven't blogged in a few days. Well, here it is Monday night and I haven't blogged since Saturday! I kinda had a rough weekend. I really don't even know where to start. I think that people are really ridiculous most of the time.

Sunday night, I had so many people who were trying to make plans with me, knowing that we didn't have school today. There was so many options to choose from that I really don't know where to start. I wanted to do something different, but most of the people wanted to go to the September Fest, which isn't really my cup of tea. Someone gets shot like EVERY YEAR, so why would you want to go? I'm not sure, but I heard some of my friends' say it was wack anyway. I didn't want to go, but I didnt want to be stuck inside the house neither. Anyways, theres this ordeal called 99. It's a walk-through Christian type of haunted house, that re-enacts how teenagers die. Supposedly 99 teens die a day, and the whole objective to this catastrpohe was to make teens really realize what can happen. Sunday was the last night for this 99 thing. My friend and I ended up going because she had free tickets. The line was really long. To make a long story short we waited for over 2-and-a-half hours! It was really crazy! I really wanted to go in there because I knew it would be a good lesson for the both of us. My friends starts TRIPPIN! ALl of a sudden she wants to leave and all this stuff. In the end, I was really mad because I wanted to go through. Some of my other friends had told me how great it was.

I guess I haven't really told you that I also got a new piercing. It's on my ear, and it's called the helix. It hurt so bad! It was the worst pain I've felt in a while. That piercing hurt the most out of everything! I know I'm going to sit here and say I will never get another piercing again, but that's a complete lie. =

Anyways, I'm going to try and get alot of hours at work even if it means staying til 9 everynight. I just can't go two weeks with the ckeck size I had last week! That check was super ridiculously small. It saddened me. Seriously.

My best friend. She's been acting weird lately. I don't really know what's wrong with her. I hope that I can figure it out because I really don't like her acting the way she's been acting lately.

I'm starting to get sleepy, so hopefully this is enough for Ms. Bruland to accept!

PS: My prayers are going out to the people of New Orleans. It sucks that they are going through this hell that they went through just a few years back, when they haven't even recovered from the last hurricane.